Thoughts of
by insanity-rocks147
Summary: What does a nerd feel? What does an emo? What do I feel? Well, that's at the end of all this. So please, if you want to know how I feel, R&R, or else you may never know what goes on inside my head.
1. Thoughts of an emo

_**(NOTE: I am NOT emo!!! I'm occasionally gonna so these thoughts of an insane person and other crap like that. So yeah. Just wanted to tell you that.)**_

Thoughts of an emo:

I think I'm worthless, I think I'm not needed,

Unloved.

Unneeded.

Everyone worries, but it's fake. Their worry is clearly just for the people they love, who could be hurt by me.

They're lucky they have those people.

I love no-one, for no-one loves me.

My mother is busy, my father at work.

I stay up late, slitting my wrists.

My mother shrieks at the blood stains on her carpet, wondering how they got there.

I tell her nothing.

She might send me to rehab. But I am fine. I'll kill myself sooner or later anyways.

So what's the use of improving an insignificant life?

For the life has not much longer to live, and it has no use in the big scheme of things.

The life will soon turn to death, spinning in the deepest circle of hell.

The world hates me, and it will forever.

Unless…

Unless I die, they will feel sympathy and compassion.

When I die, they will give me flowers and do everything they can for me.

Unlike in life.

They did nothing for me.

But they will.


	2. Thoughts of a nerd

Thoughts of a nerd:

I stand in the hall.

My homework is done.

The cool guy doesn't look at me, the cool girls giggle as they pass.

But they come by for their homework, for I have finished that for them too.

Don't do it, you say?

Fight the power?

No.

I don't dare.

They'll hurt me in ways unimaginable.

The psychic scars will live on, even as I lie there, dying.

But if I do their homework and get them A's, maybe, just maybe, they'll let me have lunch with them.

Just once.

That's all that I ask of them.

Nothing more.

But if I come close to them, the guys tell me that a flat-chested girl like me will never be cool.

The girls call me fat and clumsy.

Just because I got one wrong on their homework assignments.

The only ones I can depend on are my real friends.

We do homework together.

We play dorky board games.

We even play with my little sister's toys.

We think its fun.

Hang on.

I think there are some good parts of being a nerd.

I get to have fun.

And people don't judge me.

I don't have far to fall.

I don't get gossiped about.

And I actually have friends, not followers.

They all love me.

Like their own sister.

So I guess God dealt me a good hand.

I pity the popular ones.

They have so little fun throughout the whole course of their lives.

So I end this, with a smile and an awkward happy dance.

But guess what?

I'm a nerd, so awkward dances?

They're allowed.

When you're a nerd, life is good.


	3. Thoughts of a weird person

Thoughts of a weird person:

I dwell in randomness

Yes, I know that isn't a word.

Randomness is a word of my own creation.

My imagination works day and night, thinking up randomly cool yet totally weird random stuff.

I think the little short fat guy inside my brain is drinking too much coffee.

Either that or he's on drugs.

My parents won't let me- I'll let you fill in that last word.

You thought I was gonna say take drugs, right?

Wrong! I was gonna say drink coffee, but drugs works too.

Cuz, you know, it's not like my parents are gonna come up to me and say:

"Honey, here's some cocaine. Go play."

Not gonna happen.

If it did I would stare at my parents weirdly, take the drugs, throw them on the floor (not the carpet though) go get the mini-vacuum, and vacuum it all up.

Then I'd probably call the doctor.

And 911.

What am I doing talking about drugs?

But then again, that's just proving my randomness to you.

I am unique, talented, cool, weird, and modest.

Definitely modest nods seriously.

Me and me friend Wenbo, we always have these fake fights, where we're all like "Stop it Wenbo! You're so mean to me all the time!" and then she's like "What's the matter with you, Mariya? Why are you always like this to me?" and then five minutes after this madness, we randomly burst out laughing.

Randomly.

So yeah, now you know for sure that I am random, and weirs, and probably insane, too.

But I love every single 'friggin minute of it!


End file.
